29 April 2008
The Forbidden Kingdom
Unless you have been living in a cave, this is the movie with Jet Li and Jackie Chan in it.
Surprisingly quite entertaining.
Story
Based loosely on the myth of the Monkey King.
Forbidden Kingdom, not the four Musketeers
Trivia
Jet Li – got his front teeth capped.
Or was that done before the “Warlords”?
Crap
Jackie
Old enough to be a grandfather. Still acting like he is in his 20s.
Watch him struggled to throw his weight (literally) around.
My jowl can kill!
Had a mop for hair.
Could at least have greyed it to show some age.
Look ma’ – new use for your mop!
Jet Li
Jet Li must never smile or laugh. Period.
It makes him look like an idiot.
This he did. After the fight with Jackie.
He laughed when he was face to face with Jason.
While you squirmed in your seat.
Thou shalt not smile…
At least you can see his dental work during the scene.
Fight in the temple
The talk of the town.
Jet Li vs Jackie Chan.
Shall we start with the tango or the cha-cha?
Crap.
Simply a rehash of all the moves from Wong Fei Hong plus shaolin temple series thrown in.
Nothing to be write home to your mistress about.
Still, sufficiently entertaining
The Beauties
Yifei Liu
The rose among the thorns. The leading lady who does not lead.
The candy piece that every male wants to taste. Sigh…
Any sweeter, it’s diabetes for you.
The girl you want to take home to your mother
Bingbing Li
Beautiful in a foxy way. The villainess. Cruel and evil.
She can be as cruel and as evil as she wants with me. Take me, baby.
The girl you don’t want to take home to your father
The Best part
Where the leading lady unrobed.
Under the moonlight. To the strain of the lute.
With nothing on, the camera zoom in. Frontal.
Started at the neck. Down the left shoulder.
Creamy white perfect skin. Then it zooms down to…
Wait a minute…
Wrong movie.
“The Forbidden Fruit”.
That’s for future post.
Crap!
















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